Self-confidence (or lack thereof) is one of the biggest factors in determining how you feel about yourself, how you interact with others and how likely you are to achieve goals. 

Making just a few small changes in your daily routine can give you an instant confidence boost and have a positive impact on the way you think about yourself.


Easy Confidence Boosters:

smileResearch has shown that even a fake smile can instantly lift your mood making you feel better, safer and more relaxed; all of which can boost confidence and make you feel happier overall.

complimentSometimes when people give us a compliment, we search for ways to water it down and argue against it. Just accept it with a simple “thank you” and let it sink in. This trains your brain to accept positive feedback from others, which makes you more likely to accept positive feedback from yourself.

meditateResearch has shown that spending a little bit of time each day meditating vastly improves self-acceptance. Try sitting quietly for a few moments and focus on breathing while thinking compassionately about yourself and/or another person .

learnnew Learning something new is a great way to feel good about yourself, especially if it’s something you’ve always wanted to try. Then the more you do it and the better you become at the task, the more your confidence in that task and yourself will increase.

smell Anxiety can lead to a decreased sense of self-worth and confidence, but certain scents are known to lower anxiety: green apple and cucumber are the best for this. When you know you will be facing stressful situations during the day, spray the scent on your wrist in the morning. Then when you feel your anxiety levels rising, take a moment to breathe in the scent and relax.

rest Getting enough sleep has a lot of health benefits and is also one of the best ways to feel better about yourself. Sleep reduces inflammation that stress hormones cause, so when you get enough rest you wake up feeling better both physically and emotionally.

mirror Studies have found that the more time a woman spends on her appearance, the less likely she is to be happy. This is because the more time you spend in front of the mirror, the more likely you are to start criticizing your own appearance and focus on things you don’t like about yourself. Change that habit by doing what you need to get ready for the day and then stepping away from the mirror before you have a chance to overanalyze your look. Just get ready and go.

posture There have been a lot of studies proving that the way you sit/stand has an impact on the way you think about yourself. You can trick yourself into thinking more confidently by correcting your posture and standing or sitting up straight. Research has found that sitting or standing in a power pose for just two minutes can leave you feeling more confident, powerful and in control for the rest of the day.

eat healthy When you fuel your body with nutritious foods you not only feel better physically but you also feel better about yourself emotionally. Better nutrition will give you more energy during the day and help you sleep better at night, which will also give your confidence a boost.

recover Many people are held back in life by their fear of failure, but getting defeated now and then is absolutely inevitable. Instead of thinking you always have to succeed, accept the fact that failure is a possibility and change the way you view it. Use any setback as a way to learn and grow. Then get over failure faster by continuing to move forward and focusing on the next step ahead.

exercise Studies have shown that even just one work out session improved the way women felt about their bodies. You don’t have to kill yourself in the gym, but simply commit to moving more throughout the day. Focus less on how your body looks and more on how your body feels; exercise will give you more energy and make you feel proud of your body and what it can accomplish.

people lkeA lot of anxiety in social situations is caused by worrying about whether or not people will like you and thinking that you have to get them to like you. However, if you walk into a room assuming that the people there like you, it will give you the confidence you need to stand up straighter and be yourself without feeling pressure to act in a certain way to try and fit in.  organize Taking the time to organize will make you feel more in control of your life and boost self-esteem. Instead of getting overwhelmed by trying to organize a lot at once, simply start with organizing one small thing per week.

celebrate yourself A lot of times we focus so much on the things we like about other people that we completely ignore our own good qualities. Make a list of the things you like about yourself and are proud of and allow yourself to reflect on them. Keep the list as something to look at whenever you need a quick confidence boost.

conversation Engaging in conversation makes you feel good about yourself and by striking up a conversation with a stranger you learn to find connections with other people. The more you do it the easier it becomes to approach and talk to people you don’t know, which will ease your anxiety in larger social situations.

procrastinating When you procrastinate, the task at hand is always in the back of your mind. This can weigh you down and kill your self-esteem by making you feel like you have no control over your life. Start with one small part of the task and complete it. When the small task is finished it makes the bigger task less daunting and helps you feel more in control of your life, which will help your self-esteem.

volunteer Helping other people is one of the easiest and most fulfilling ways to feel better about yourself. It will give you a deeper sense of worth and accomplishment and leave you feeling happier and more grateful in your own life.

donate Donating is a great way to boost self-esteem; when you feel like you are helping others, your own feelings of self-worth increase as you find a deeper meaning and purpose in life. If you aren’t in a position to donate money, you can donate time by volunteering or even donate things you don’t need, like clothes. It is a great way to be helpful and also clear clutter out of the house, which as an added bonus can make you feel more organized.

be grateful Numerous studies have concluded that those who are the most grateful are also the happiest in life. It’s important to realize that those who have the most in life aren’t the happiest but rather it’s those who are the most grateful for the things they do have that are the happiest. When you concentrate on what you lack, you start to feel worse about yourself and your situation. But, when you focus on the blessings in your life and the things that you are grateful for, your happiness level increases, as does your self-esteem.

walk Negative body image can kill self-esteem, but research has shown that simply increasing the amount you walk can lead to more positive feelings about your body. In a study, those who increased the amount of steps they took per day, just three days a week, reported an increase in body-image satisfaction; the more steps a person took the better they felt about their own body. There are also added health benefits to walking more.

picturesuccessWhen you are facing a daunting task or a situation you are anxious about, take time to visualize yourself completing it successfully. Research shows that the more you visualize yourself succeeding, the more likely you are to actually achieve that outcome.
dressResearch has shown that those who “dress for success” actually start to view themselves as more successful. This doesn’t encourage focusing on the way you look, but rather on the way you feel. When you get dressed in the morning, concentrate on how the outfit you pick out makes you feel about yourself. Even if you don’t have a lot to do during the day, dressing for success can make you more motivated, more confident and make you feel better about yourself and believe more in your own potential for success.  treat Those who focus solely on catering to others tend to develop lowered self-esteem because they start to ignore their own mental, emotional and physical needs. While helping others will boost confidence, it’s important not to ignore yourself completely in the process. You can take care of others better when you are also taking care of yourself, so reward yourself occasionally and find time for yourself every once in a while to relax and unwind. Then you will be refreshed and will be able to help others more efficiently, and you won’t resent the time you are spending on others because you are no longer ignoring your own needs.


turn thoughts

Most of us have a habit of always focusing on things that could go wrong. We constantly make excuses and come up with reasons for not trying certain things, but by continually thinking in a negative way, we actually prevent ourselves from having a positive outcome.

Destructive thoughts end up attracting failure and sabotaging your own chances for success and happiness. However, when you become aware of the negative thoughts you have, you can turn them around and start thinking in a more positive way, thus attracting a more positive outcome.


Common Examples:


dthought “I’m not a people person.”

turn aroundBy claiming this is a personality trait, you convince yourself that it’s something you can’t control or change about yourself, but really it’s just an excuse to avoid mingling with new people. You believe you are the only one who feels awkward making small talk and so you avoid it and claim that you’re just not good or comfortable around other people. But the more you say this to yourself, the more it starts to hinder you in social situations; you genuinely believe you will be unable to connect with anyone else at an event and so you simply don’t try to.

To turn it around, understand that almost everyone gets anxious talking to strangers. This will help you feel better if you do find yourself in an awkward situation or striving to rescue an uncomfortable conversation. Mentally redefine what a “people person” is: instead of thinking you have to hit it off with everyone at an event or be the life of the party, just aim to connect with one or two people there.


dthought “If I get too excited, I’ll jinx it.”

turn aroundThis is always said as an attempt to protect yourself from disappointment; you can’t be disappointed if you never let yourself get excited in the first place. But by doing this you actually increase your chance of failing. You have already prepared for a negative outcome, which subconsciously affects the way you act in the meantime. You don’t work as hard or as passionately as you would have if you only had success on your mind, and therefore you end up creating a self-fulfilled prophecy and receiving the negative outcome you expected.

You actually increase your odds of success when you fully allow yourself to feel and to be excited. When you imagine a great outcome, it increases your excitement and motivates you to work harder towards fulfilling that goal. Even if the outcome isn’t what you wanted, the excitement that you felt becomes intoxicating and makes you more likely to recover from failure and try again.


dthought “I don’t want to inconvenience anyone.”

turn aroundThis attitude cripples you because you become so afraid of putting someone else out that you end up never asking for what you want and consequently never move forward in life. As long as pursuing your goal doesn’t involve hurting someone else (by lying, cheating, or purposely destroying someone else’s reputation) then you owe it to yourself to start taking the steps towards getting there.

Understand that sometimes if someone has a negative reaction to what you’re doing, it is more of a problem that they have with themselves than one that they have with you. Always be considerate of others, but don’t be afraid to go for what you want out of fear of inconveniencing someone.


dthought “I’m in over my head.”

turn around

This excuse is used when a task starts to become too challenging; when you are in the middle of a stressful situation and don’t want to look incompetent or have your flaws showcased, you say this as a way to get out of it. Similar to the “fight or flight” response, you would rather back out and claim to not have what it takes than fight to overcome the obstacle. However, when you do this you never get to show yourself what you’re made of and how much you’re truly capable of.

To turn it around, start to view situations like this as an opportunity to prove yourself, instead of as a roadblock preventing you from succeeding. Visualize how you’ll feel after you’ve conquered the task and use that to motivate you. Always fight to keep your inner voice positive and, if it does turn negative, catch it and change it. If someone else says you don’t have what it takes, work to prove them wrong instead of letting it hold you back.


dthought “They know what I want, so I don’t have to ask.”

turn around

This is commonly used as an excuse for not speaking up and asking for what you want. In some cases you may even believe that the result won’t mean as much if you’ve had to ask for it, but if you never speak up you risk never receiving it at all. For example if you are waiting for a raise at work and are afraid of asking for it, you might tell yourself that they’ll eventually just offer it to you. Or if you want your significant other to surprise you with something, you may assume they know what you want and feel as though you shouldn’t have to ask for it. But both of these things place your happiness in the hands of someone else.

You should never put someone else in charge of your happiness. If you want something, don’t be afraid of vocalizing it. Weigh the options: you can face the brief awkwardness of saying what you want and then actually get what you want, or you can wait under the false assumption that the other person knows and will give you what you want, and then not actually get it.

Remember that no one can read minds and not everyone can pick up on subtle hints; it’s OK to blatantly ask for what you want as it will increase your chance of getting it and keep you from unfairly getting angry at someone who never knew what you wanted in the first place.


dthought “If it’s meant to be, it will happen on its own.”

turn around

This excuse claims that if something doesn’t simply land in your lap without you having to go out of your way for it, then it just “wasn’t meant to be”. You say this to convince yourself that your life is out of your own control, but really it’s just an excuse to cover up the fact that you’re afraid of moving forward and taking the first step.

Turn it around by understanding that your actions do affect fate. Just one or two little steps forward can cause a huge ball to start rolling in your favor. You create your own momentum: if you never take the first step you’ll never move anywhere, but if you take the first small step, you’ll then be more inclined to take the next small step and so forth until you’ve finally ended up where you wanted to be.

Don’t just leave it up to fate; if one door closes, the only way another one will open is if you keep knocking until you find the one that does. Keep taking small steps forward and never simply wait and do nothing, thinking that something will “just happen” for you when the time is right. Things will only happen for you if you’re taking the initiative and attempting to move forward.



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